Disturbing Commercial News

A planner walks in the room, sits down across the table from a team of disinterested creatives. She sternly ruffles through her papers to find her just completed creative brief.

She says, "Listen guys, we've gone about as far as we can go with this whole 'squeezably soft' thing. There are far too many other soft brands on the market. We've done double soft, triple-layered and quardruple protection. The research indicates that a quint is simply not a credible claim.  We've lost our USP. But I've got something even better."

The creatives lean forward, listening intently for the first time.

The planner continues,"so here it is, the new proposition is...we don't leave specs of soiled toilet paper stuck to your bum."

Silence befalls the room.

"So your challenge is to tell people we don't leave the specs without inducing a collective audience vomit."

The creatives gleefully exchange glances around the room before shouting in unison, "Bears!"

And thus this disturbing fail whale was begat.